Hell Week

Isn't it strange, I say it's hell week, but I still have time to post in my xanga baby? Haha, just read on.

I say it's hell week not because I have countless exams for the week coz I actually don't have any. I'm not saying it's hell week because there are numerous deadlines for the week - there actually is just one this friday, and two early next week. It's hell week because of our friggin Feasibility Study (our equvailent for thesis of most college students), of which the Technical part is due this Friday and we've got less than a week to cram all the information we need for it. Not that we're cramming... but we're being forced to cram by the circumstances, no thanks to him who must not be named... Yup, I'm panicking like I've never panicked ever in my life. I just don't show it much. Besides that, we've got three other projects with deadlines pouring over us like rain on a September afternoon. More panick. And I'm afraid of panicking because I'm afraid it might spike up my heart rate and wreck my system (just ask me why, its a long explanation). I'm afraid, and then I panick once again.

Right now, I'm too exhausted from the day to write the paper. I'm too exhausted from driving around Ortigas, going around, here and there, to meetings and interviews for our projects. I'm too exhausted from panicking. I'm blogging as a way of distracting myself, not from what I have to do, but from panicking. I'm doing a lot of distracting just to put my brain back into its functional mode.

I can feel the hell week slowly taking its toll on me. Early afternoon, I was wondering if I was able to take my medicine (for my heart) this morning, because I was palpitating once again. I took another dose then; I was allowed an extra dose for the day anyway (but I usually just take two doses each day, in the morning and at night). Just tonight I realized I did take one this morning. Well, I took another one for tonight. I need all the pharmaceutical help I could have to get me through this hell week. That's all I'm relying on right now.

It's hell week, because I need to make the impossible possible this week. And it's pressuring me like pressure cooker (I can just imagine how that meat is feeling). A technical plan in one week, no kidding. Three other projects in the kiln due in the next few days. And I haven't mentioned my extracurricular stuff - the newsletter I need to help with that we have to release by Monday, and the finance mini-workshop we are preparing for this coming friday.

I don't have the energy and the right state of mind to do anything acad related tonight. I'll just do everything tomorrow and the day after. I need to relax. Eat something sweet. Read something non-acad related. Just do anything other than acads.